Tuesday, April 28, 2009

L'introversion, l'Intuition, Sentir, Juger

It is apparently impossible to remember or maybe just to comprehend:

I – Introversion preferred to Extraversion: INFJs tend to be quiet and reserved. They generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy).

N – iNtuition preferred to Sensing: INFJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus their attention on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.

F – Feeling preferred to Thinking: INFJs tend to rely on a personal, internal sense of right and wrong rather than external, objective criteria. When making decisions, they often give more weight to feelings and social considerations than to logic.

J – Judgment preferred to Perception: INFJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability, which to perceptive types may seem limiting.

But don't keep any of it in mind, don't use this information to understand or diagnose... ignore it and just hope that 36 years of incubation of a personality will vanish.


Qui Epargnera le sain d'esprit Qui Epargnera le sain d'esprit

Periodic tableware, Psychotropic science fare

But who will save the sane?
Some beings just can't change
Now crawl on by A fake tear in your eye
And think isn't he strange

Pseudogasmic chemistry Necromorphic apathy

Physical laws unapplied Hamper my quest
Unsurreal world of unfailed HIV tests
Der ubermensch warning of pi techno junkies - 3.141592653

Tentative ambulance date bound for G ward
Bear trap psychiatrist bait chew my paw off
Unmercilessly we will take you away to slumber
But only if you can recite Avogadro's number

Now crawl on by A fake tear in your eye
And think wasn't he strange


Monday, April 27, 2009


Now it evens out between black and white.
A victim of choice, so matter of factly said:
"I'm working on the best two out of three."
In half-time we move, lines blurring fact and fiction.
We merely improvise.

You wonder about the truth and which version's mine.
What's wrong with losing myself in things I might have said to you?
Think about it now and all those things I should have said,
have trouble getting through.
Just speak my peace and turn away.

Somewhere it evens out between wrong and right.
If given the chance, feet first she would jump right in.
Her heart will burn to ashes either way.

Feeling less remembered. Losing myself in things I might have said to you. You never seemed to care at all. Just speak my peace and turn away.



"When a woman wants to betray her husband, her actions are almost invariably studied but they are never reasoned." ~ Honoré de Balzac

"Betrayal is the only truth that sticks." ~ Arthur Miller

"He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore." ~ Sigmund Freud

"I have never known a more vulgar expression of betrayal and deceit." ~ Lucien Bouchard

"Love is whatever you can still betray. Betrayal can only happen if you love." ~ John le Carre

"The betrayal of trust carries a heavy taboo." ~ Aldrich Ames

"The fear really hits you. That's what you feel first. And then it's the anger and frustration. Part of the problem is how little we understand about the ultimate betrayal of the body when it rebels against itself." ~ Charles Bronson

"The issue of the Betrayal was so central to that, I felt the need to comment upon it. My choices were to ignore the games and put them "outside" of continuity or to integrate them. I chose the latter." ~ Raymond E. Feist

"Anyone who hasn't experienced the ecstasy of betrayal knows nothing about ecstasy at all." ~ Jean Genet

"Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise, and trading on your integrity and not having dignity in life. That's really where failure comes." ~ Tom Cochrane

"We have to distrust each other. It is our only defense against betrayal." ~ Tennessee Williams

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Le démenti Peut Amener la Félicité Maritale

Written by Meredith F. Small

With the divorce rate hovering around 50 percent, and so many people married more than once, it sometimes feels like humans are terrible at figuring out long-term love.

The typical pattern starts with falling head-over-heels for someone, with all its heat-thumping, starry-eyed craziness, and it takes a while before that fog dissipates and the real object of desire comes into focus. Often, the truth doesn't hit until after marriage when the real person, warts and all, wakes up next to you in bed wearing a wedding ring.

Reality check, with it's evil twin disillusionment, are sure ways to kill off a marriage.

In a study to be published in July in the journal Psychological Science, Northwestern University psychologist Daniel Molden and colleagues were interested in the possible differences between the way dating and married couples see each other. They asked 92 dating couples and 77 married couples to complete questionnaires about satisfaction with their relationship, and not surprising, marriage changes things.

Everyone, married or dating, thinks the best partner is one who acts as a cheering section and brings out our best. But that sort of relationship only translates into a truly happy marriage when the partner seems to accept real commitment and helps in the day-to-day obligations of life as a couple.

The surprise here is not the switch from a focus on "me" to a focus on "us," as anyone who has gone from the first blush of love to picking up someone else's underwear off the floor knows to be true. What really stands out is the idea that satisfaction within any relationship is based on perception rather than actual fact, and therein lies the rub of not only love, but also of living with someone on intimate terms.

In Molden's study, the authors focus on their subjects' "perception" of the other person, not the reality of the situation. If we perceive a date to be supportive of our goals, we're happy. If we perceive a spouse as committed to the family, we're even more happy. Although the researchers point to the shift in the focus of perception from ourselves to the couple as an indicator of a good or bad marriage, the real problem for love is the very issues of projecting anything on another person, no matter the focus.

Humans seem to think they are really good at knowing others, but the truth is our own agendas get in the way of really knowing someone. As self-interested, self-absorbed creatures, our own thoughts, feelings, needs and goals come first, and that sometimes means fooling ourselves into thinking we are the center of other people's thoughts, feelings, needs and goals when, in fact, they are mired in their own business.

But should we be disillusioned by our own illusions? Maybe not. Happy marriages might just be those in which both partners uphold a very nice projection of each other, even when things aren't so great. And this makes sense. Happiness is a state of mind, and if denial paints a partner better than they really are, the relationship is bound to be satisfying, as long as no one is slapped in the face with reality.

On the other hand, surely there are couples who see exactly who is in front of them, and reality actually matches perception. Those lucky couples are not in a state of continual denial, but a state of continual bliss.

(Meredith F. Small is an anthropologist at Cornell University. She is also the author of "Our Babies, Ourselves; How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Parent" and "The Culture of Our Discontent; Beyond the Medical Model of Mental Illness". Her Human Nature column appears each Friday on LiveScience.)
Denial Can Bring Marital Bliss

Friday, April 24, 2009

Tirer Premier, Demander aux Questions plus tard

Congratulations must be in order to Shoot 'Em Up director Michael Davis who has unapologetically kicked my ass. Of the vast amount of films I've seen, he's managed to deliver one that is officially the most over the top, mind-numbingly bold 86 minutes in cinema. Forget John Woo, forget Tarantino, forget Rodriguez, Davis has undoubtedly milked the proverbial action movie teat to bone dry. And laughed with his audience as he dabbed his chin.

This isn't to say that Shoot 'Em Up is bad or that it was not entertaining, but let's give credit where credit was demanded at gun-point. Had this movie not stared two uber-talents like Clive Owen and Paul Giamatti then I don't know that anyone would have seen it... um, did anyone see it?

I can't say much about the plot without giving it away other than a guy (Owen) tries to protect an new-born baby from assassins (Giamatti, among others). The "why" is almost irrelevant since the "how" is definitely more the point.

Suffice it to say that I found myself drifting when the action wasn't on screen but when it was, when I wasn't mumbling "oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me" under my breath, I was actually enjoying the crap out of myself. It's over the top sure, but it's worth a watch. Sorry, no refunds for lost lunch.

Shoot First, Ask Questions Later

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Bon Au revoir (Encore)

I got this thinkin' in my head
You wanna say the things not said

Whats the reason?

Don't really care if you leave
Just wanna see me beaten
Don't really care if you grieve
Don't really need a reason

Hey, goodbye
I wish you'd stayed here
I wish you were here

I just can't believe
that you're not really with me
I just can't believe
I wonder if you'll miss me



Avec Tout La Fierté Et Dignité D'UN Nageur qui noie

Disassemble me, examine every piece and then tear it apart again.
My progress doesn't meet your standards, crucified a martyr.
So we listen to you, "It's softer, they've sold out."
The judge's wait... here's to you.
"It's over, they've played out."
Do we listen to you because you're asking the question?
You talk so much I can't understand how these shots from your mouth can even sound fair. It happens time and time again is this all you do?
With All The Pride And Dignity Of A Drowning Swimmer

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Something to watch while you're up on your Earth Day high horse... Parts I, II and III

For the buzz-word using, band-wagon jumping, easily led sheep working extra hard to do no favors for anyone.


Ex Men

1) Anything with Jason Bateman is pretty much gold, 2) Amanda Peet (I know, she's not for everyone and I don't usually go for the uber-skinny but... something about her does it for me) and 3) Zach Braff, although a one trick pony, is damn good at that one trick (I can probably say that because it's been a while since I've seen The Last Kiss or Garden State).

The Ex is pretty funny, the cast was unexpectedly eccentric, under-stated and well put together. I'd own this movie so, you should definitely see it. Although, you'll probably be the only person in your zip code who will have done so. And by the way, It was originally promoted under the working title Fast Track.


Friday, April 10, 2009

Jeux drôles

I couldn't look away. Immediately bought it. Pray Criterion. If you find yourself easily sickened, in a hurry to offer up pity and do not get the art, steer clear of this masterpiece. Be warned... your stomach and nerves will be shot, your resolve tested and your mind left an utter clump. You will change.


Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Une balle

182 minutes of cute-and-paste, coming-of-age, nail-biting, late 1960s Russian-American steel workers hunting deer, then men, then deer, then each other. Micheal Camino at his best.
"Assholes..I love 'em but they're assholes... without you Nicky, I hunt alone." -Michael Vronsky
One Bullet

Monday, April 06, 2009

Le Meilleur Conseil de Relation je Jamais Ai Obtenu

Nine women spill the secret words of wisdom that keep their relationship blissful.

No doubt, there are days when you feel as though you deserve the "Best Partner in the World" award: You make sure dates with your mate stay fun, you settle arguments with amazing grace and you don't always go into whining mode when you find his dirty socks next to, rather than in, the hamper. How did you get so smart? You were given some stellar advice from friends and family. Here, the nuggets of relationship wisdom you've stayed faithful to over the years.

#1. Polite Fight
"On my wedding-invitation RSVP cards, I left space for guests to write their favorite wedding wisdom. The tidbit that rings truest after almost nine months of marriage is: 'Attack the issue, not each other.' How it works: If my husband and I disagree about something, we stay focused on the issue and skip the personal put-downs." -- Melissa Gitter Schilowitz, 31, Metuchen, NJ

#2. Fit to a Tee
"My grandmother insisted that I learn how to play golf. 'If your husband loves to play, you can go along and spend hours together,' she said. So I took lessons, and now my husband and I hit the links once a month. We both love the game and are thrilled to share a hobby, even when we spend half an hour looking for my out-of-bounds balls!" -- Aimee Borders, 27, Houston, TX

#3. Tabletop Trick
"My aunt told me that if I'm running late when it's my turn to make dinner, just set the table. That way my husband thinks he'll be eating any minute, so he doesn't start complaining, which buys me some time. It's a silly trick that sounds straight out of the 1950s, but I have to admit that I've tried it a few times in the three years I've been married -- and it works!" -- Dawn Clayton, 34, Holdrege, NE

#4. Boob-Tube Brilliance
"Because my husband is such a remote-control freak, my mom suggested that we have 'my turn' TV nights. That means three nights a week I get to hold the remote and watch whatever I want, and on the other nights it's his turn to hold the remote and watch whatever he wants. Now when he starts flipping through the channels, it doesn't get on my nerves like it used to." -- Angela Clayton, 27, Odenton, MD

#5. Pop the Question
"My sister-in-law passed this helpful hint on to me, and it has served me well for our five years of wedded bliss: 'Marriage is not mind reading, so ask your spouse what he/she wants and believe what he/she says.'" -- Clare Graca, 27, Dallas

#6. Nix the Nit-Picking
"Before I said 'I do,' my mom (who's been married to my dad for 55 years) told me to take out a piece of paper and write down the top three things that bugged me about my husband-to-be. Then she told me to forget the things on that list and forgive him for not being flawless. Once you make a commitment this big, she explained, you can't let petty things get in the way. In our eight years of marriage, my husband and I have had two kids, tackled cross-country moves and started two businesses -- and so far, so great."-- Rebecca Hart Blaudow, 31, Jacksonville, FL

#7. Space Smarts
"Always have separate closets, my best friend told me. It may seem silly, but I listened to her and made sure to find a one-bedroom apartment with two closets (mine being the larger, of course). Now my husband and I each have our own private space, and we respect that: If he wants to keep his shoes in one huge heap or leave his dirty clothes in a pile on the floor, the mess doesn't bother me a bit!" -- Patricia Bontekoe, 26, Lake Hiawatha, NJ

#8. Agree to Disagree
"Before we got married, my minister told my husband and me, 'You are two imperfect people making an imperfect union, and that's wonderful.' This advice made me ditch my belief that in a happy marriage, the couple always agrees. My husband and I have learned to appreciate our differences (yes, even differences of opinion!); in fact, we encourage them because we realize now that those differences are what makes each of us unique and special." -- Beth Swanson, 28, Chicago

#9. Comic Relief
"Before I headed down the aisle, my stepfather told me to always laugh and never take myself too seriously. After four years of marriage, I know that this trick works. My husband and I often play practical jokes on each other and always try to crack each other up, even in the middle of an argument. Hey, if one person laughs, a fight tends to fizzle, doesn't it?" -- Lisa Giassa, 31, Bogota, NJ

Anti-Pop Advice From the Experts
You've probably heard a few of these pieces of marital pop wisdom before. If so, these marriage experts say to promptly forget 'em.

Love means never having to say you're sorry. "Oh, please! In marriage, love sometimes means having to say you're sorry even if you don't know what you did or you didn't mean to do it." -- Trisha Taylor, psychotherapist, Houston, TX

Always be totally honest. "What are you going to do, tell him that he's just too short and you can't stand his mother? Sometimes you need to temper the truth." -- Tara Fields, Ph.D., marriage, family and child therapist, Marin County, CA

Children come first. "This is bad advice if it means your husband always comes second. Of course you should love and care for your kids, but you should never lose sight of your couple-ness. The best thing a child can have is happy, fulfilled parents who are deeply in love." -- Mary Pender Greene, chief of social work services, Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services, New York

Always keep the peace. "No, no, no. If you don't face a hot issue head-on, you'll stockpile negative feelings. And before you know it, 20 years go by and you're still fighting over the same thing because you never resolved it in the first place." -- Rebecca S. Ward, M.S.W., psychotherapist, Little Rock, AR

Never go to bed angry. "Forget it. Often a couple needs time to calm down before they can rationally wrap up an argument. And that may take a few days, so in the meantime, get some sleep!" -- Gilda Carle, Ph.D., psychotherapist, New York
The Best Relationship Advice I Ever Got

Friday, April 03, 2009

Haut Plagiat

"There was no time for scholarly details, and, besides, I have always believed that a man can fairly be judged by the standards and taste of his choices in matters of high-level plagiarism."

~ Hunter S. Thompson (July 18, 1937 – February 20, 2005)

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Gardé dans exprimer leurs propres sensations

INFJs have a rich, vivid inner life, which they may be reluctant to share with those around them.

They are guarded in expressing their own feelings, and so tend to establish close relationships slowly. INFJs tend to be easily hurt, and may "silently withdraw as a way of setting limits," rather than expressing their wounded feelings—a behavior that may leave others confused and upset.

INFJs are intricately and deeply woven, mysterious, and highly complex, sometimes puzzling even to themselves. They have an orderly view toward the world, but are internally arranged in a complex way that only they could understand. Abstract in communicating, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities.